The Adulting Lady

Hey Countess

The issue of friendships as a Christian is an important one and affects many people in different ways. As a committed Christian you want to ensure that you form relationships with people who will not deter you from doing your best walk with Christ. Just a little insight into my life, I have struggled with forming relationships from very early in life. Once I was aware of who I am in Christ, and that was around 13 years old, anyone who did not follow the life I knew to be right as a Christian, did not qualify to be my friend. So if you partied, drank alcohol, swore, and pretty much led a life less than morally perfect, you simply could not be my friend. Afterall, Romans12:2 says “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.” To be honest though, I think this behaviour chased away potential friends and even potential converts to Christ.

As I have grown up though, I realise that we cannot alienate people for their choices. In fact, we can learn from them. How they accept people for who they are. Be more loving and accepting of others instead of judgmental – even in your head. Matthew 7:1-2 says “Do not judge, or you too will be judged. In the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.” Jesus declared love to be the greatest commandment of all of them (Matthew 22:36-40). And as He did, so should we. How do you love someone when you are constantly judging their actions? The answer is very simple. You can’t. Choose to pray for the people whose actions you do not agree with and love them the way Christ loves you even when you sin. I have realised that all people, whether you think they are good or bad, have something to teach you. No one is perfect in knowledge and action. And truth is, the people of the world, know how to manoeuvre successfully in it better than most Christians do.

Loving people means to be kind to them no matter how they behave or how they treat you or what they mean to you. In my opinion, unless they try to change your thinking to mirror that of the world, accept them. You may learn a few things from them. Remember, everyone in this world has knowledge to offer. If the people around you seem to have no sense of right and wrong, and constantly engage in behaviours of self-harm or that harm other people, then it’s best to keep them at a safe distance from yourself. If you feel pressured to commit the following, make your exit. “Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness, Idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions, heresies, envying, murders, drunkenness and revelling (Galatians 5:19-26).” These behaviours will destruct you from the important things in your life such as having good relationships with your family and friends, and from doing your best in your career and life in general. If your friends or potential friends are good people, making a living, working hard and having fun responsibly, and they are appreciative of you let them be a part of your life.

I would like to leave you with a reminder that although you are in this world, you are not of it, and that your home is in Heaven. Do not lose yourself here.

All love ❤

Mmakwena G